9 Things I Didn't Realize Were Signs I Was Entering a New Chapter of Life

A few days ago I posted a carousel on Instagram that I almost didn't share.

I honestly thought maybe a handful of women would relate and everyone else would scroll right past it.

Instead, there were hundreds of comments from women saying, "I thought I was the only one."

That made me realize maybe we're all going through some version of the same thing. We just call it different names.

Empty nesting. Menopause. Burnout (this is a BIG one for me). Midlife. A career change.

Kids growing up and parents getting older.

Whatever it is, I think it sneaks up on us. One day you wake up and realize your life doesn't look like it did ten years ago...and neither do you.

Looking back, I can see the little signs now.

I stopped wanting a bigger life. I started wanting one that fit.

This one kind of surprised me.

For years I would've told you I wanted to keep growing. Bigger business. Bigger impact. Bigger goals.

Now? Honestly, I want to wake up excited about my day and drink my coffee while it's still hot.

Take a walk without feeling guilty that I'm not answering emails. Travel somewhere beautiful and not feel like I need a vacation from my vacation.

Write because I love writing.

Have dinner with Craig without talking about work the whole time.

Somewhere along the way, "more" stopped being the goal and peace started sounding a whole lot more appealing.

Success stopped looking like more. It started looking like peace.

This one is still weird for me to admit because I've always been someone who loves building things. Honestly, I still do.

But these days, when I picture success, I'm not picturing awards or numbers or a big podcast appearance or even another big milestone.

I'm picturing margin that gives me time to think and be creative. Enough space in my day that I'm not rushing from one thing to the next.

Maybe that's what success was supposed to feel like all along and I just had the definition wrong.

I stopped buying clothes for the woman I used to be. I started dressing the woman I am now.

You probably knew style had to make an appearance somewhere. 😊

This past year my closet has undergone a transformation along with me. I really started paying attention to clothes that feel like me. Not some version that I used to be, not dressing for the algorithm or for other people. But just for me.

Along with this this shift, my body went through some changes too. My shape shifted and some of the pieces that used to work, just stopped. I spent a lot of years hanging onto clothes because I thought they were motivating.

I don't want clothes hanging in my closet that make me feel bad about myself. Getting dressed is a whole lot easier now and ironically, I have less than ever. But I think that's part of the magic.

No more decision fatigue! And I'm having more fun with style than ever before.

I realized I wasn't grieving youth. I was grieving familiarity.

I had this thought a few weeks ago that kind of stopped me in my tracks. I don't actually miss being younger and you literally couldn't pay me to be 30 again. 😂

What I miss is how familiar life felt, the kids were home. I knew exactly what my days looked like. I was in full-on building mode with my business.

But this one's a little harder, somedays, I also feel like I don't recognize myself in the mirror anymore.

And this one is weird because it's not about how society tells us we're supposed to look. It's about congruence. It's about wanting to seeing my eyes brighten the way they used to when I smiled. It's about the things that I miss that felt like me.

So many things have changed all at once that sometimes I don't even recognize my own life.

And it's not all in a bad way, just in a different way.

I think that's what I've been grieving. Not youth, familiarity.

Some friendships quietly stopped fitting. And that was okay.

"I stopped wanting a bigger life. I started wanting one that fit."

This was a tough one and it wasn't because anyone did anything wrong, exactly. Sometimes, growth takes people in different directions. Conversations change, priorities change and that's ok.

I've stopped trying so hard to make every friendship last exactly the way it always has. I've accepted the fact that some friendships are only meant for a season, while some may last forever. I'm grateful for the seasons but now I know when it's time to move on.

I quit trying to prove I deserved to rest.

Or...at least I'm working on it! If I'm sitting on the porch swing in the middle of the afternoon, there's still a little voice in my head asking if I've earned it yet.

Maybe you have one too. I've probably carried this message around as long as I can remember.

Lately I've been trying something different, I rest when my body and mind tell me to. Not when I've finished everything, because let's be honest, the work is never done!

I started asking...Who am I when no one needs me to be anything?

Ok, so this is a BIG one. This question has been rattling around in my head for months now. It's the first one that started tugging at me as the kids were getting older and needing me less. As the business matured and my team took on more.

For most of my adult life, life answered it for me and I didn't even have time to stop and think about it. I was too busy being a mom, wife, business owner, leader, problem solver and the one everyone could count on.

Then one day it just stopped or at least started looking different. And it took the wind out of me.

Now that life is quieter, I have the space to ask…Who am I underneath all of those roles?

That's what this space is all about. I'm not reinventing myself or becoming someone new. I'm finding my way back to the woman who was there all along.

Maybe you're entering a new chapter too.

If you've been feeling a little off lately…like the life you've always known doesn't quite fit anymore...

I just want you to know I don't think you're broken. I don't even think you're lost.

I think you might just be growing.

And growth usually feels awkward before it feels exciting. Trust me I know.

I'm figuring this out right alongside you.

Every week I'm writing about this season in my newsletter, Rediscovering Me. Sometimes it's about identity, sometimes style, sometimes beauty or travel or something completely random I've gone down a rabbit hole on. But it's always honest.

If that sounds like your kind of place, I'd love to have you there.