I Don't Want a Bigger Life Anymore. I Want One That Fits Me.

On "Enoughness".

Honestly for most of my adult life, I thought that chasing "bigger" was the ultimate goal. These past few years something in me has changed.

I wanted the bigger business, impact, platform, house, opportunities, more in my closet, more growth, more stuff.

There was a season where all of that felt exactly right to me.

I don't regret building Outfit Formulas, the long days, the risks, or even the dreams that used to feel way too big. I truly love challenging myself and breaking ceilings and seeing what's possible. I'm a first generation college graduate. I've accomplished more than my wildest dreams and am honored to have the privilege of work that's impacted the lives of so many women.

To be totally honest, this life has given me so much.

But somewhere over the past few years, something started has been shifting and I started asking myself a question.

If I had to start over again, what would I want my life to actually FEEL like?

Not look like, but how do I want to feel every day? A calmer nervous system, slower mornings with coffee on the porch, walks every afternoon. Iced tea on the porch swing after work with Craig, Traveling without documenting every second of it. Lingering over dinner and conversations with our adult kids. Being truly present in every moment.

The other day it really hit me. My daughter Aubrey was sitting on the couch, nothing special was going on, we were just talking and hanging out and I caught tears welling up in my eyes. I realized at that moment "these are the good old days". I don't want to miss out on that. I was in survival mode so much when my kids were little. I just want to be present for the life I have now, to enjoy the healing, the slowing down.

I realized that I don't want a bigger life anymore, I want one that fits me.

Success looks and feels different now. I'm choosing depth over more, presence and peace over "proving", more white space in my calendar and life. Saying no more to leave room for what really matters.

And I know this is a privilege that not everyone has. But I had to ask myself what I'm no longer willing to sacrifice for "more" and right size my life around that.

I haven't stopped dreaming and I still love creating. That hasn't changed. The little girl who grew up in the tiny town of Hopewell, Pennsylvania who always dreamed of doing something big, she's still there.

I've just stopped believing that success should come at the expense of the life I'm trying to build.

"I don't wake up dreaming about more every day anymore. I wake up dreaming about the sweetness of enough."

For a long time, my life fit my business. Now my business fits my life and that feels like a much healthier arrangement.

Sometimes I wonder if this is a part of mid-life.

Maybe we stop chasing the bigger version of life to finally fully live in the version we've built. Because we've learned what it can cost us - emotionally, physically, relationally.

Maybe we become less interested in impressing people and more interested in slowing down enough to enjoy the life we've worked so hard to build. For me, that aligns more with what I value most.

I'm still figuring it out. But I do know this, I don't wake up dreaming about more every day anymore. I wake up dreaming about the sweetness of enough.

Enough. It feels like an exhale after so many years of so much.

I don't feel like I'm shrinking my life, I'm editing it. Keeping the parts that feel like me, what feels most aligned for this chapter. Letting go of the rest.

That's given me more room to breathe, to notice and to become.

And somehow, that feels bigger than anything I was chasing before.